Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Jesus Saves -- Warren Buffett Invests


Mr. Financial Wizard Warren Buffett has decided for some reason to put $5 billion into Goldman-Sachs, one of the chief players in this financial meltdown on Wall Street.

What does this mean? To me, it means THIS is how these assholes ought to bail themselves out of this mess. They're investment bankers--let them go out and get some investors to invest in them. Good luck with all that, of course, but obviously if Mr. Wizard is giving them money, he must be expecting to make a profit somewhere down the line.

So all you financial bigwig IAOD readers--scrape your billions together and invest! (*cricket chirping*)

Oh. Uh...

Well--at the least, let's hope Congress puts the kibosh on this whole deal. OR, to continue the theme of yesterday's post, that they ask for all of Dick Cheney's paperwork and all those "lost" White House emails on a platter or it's NO DEAL. Let's kill two thieving assholes with one stone, shall we?

7 comments:

Randal Graves said...

If pulling yourself up by your bootstraps is good enough for us, it should be good enough for those whose bootstraps are made out of silk with gold leaf, or whatever rich people wear.

I still wonder if The Undisclosed Location is around these parts. Been seeing a LOT of trucks owned by shredding companies.

Sorghum Crow said...

I got billions (of atoms in my body) otherwise not so much.

Elizabeth said...

Nobody bails me out when I need help. Why do these guys get all the breaks?

Joe said...

I'm torn. I have a few million I need to invest, and I'm torn between investing in bootstraps or just buying a congressman.

dguzman said...

Randal--Be afraid! Be very afraid!

Crow--that's about all I've got billions of too.

Enc--because your bailout or mine would only entail a few thousand bucks, most likely. It's only fun for them when the figures are in the billions-with-a-b or more!

Bubs--buy the congressman. It's cheaper and you get results right away.

Anonymous said...

Hadn't thought of that. Huh......hmmmm.....has anyone mentioned that you're freaking smart?

Seriously, the urgency of this "crisis" is making me very skeptical.

Why now?

dguzman said...

DCup--As if. Other people got there far sooner than I did, I'm sure. I just read somewhere or other the theory that Buffett is insulating Goldman-Sachs (which Paulson used to helm, BTW!) and maybe letting the other guys take it up the ass. Who knows? But when Buffett pulls out his wallet, you know something's up.